Tuesday, 16 June 2020,
I know I’m not the only one but having multiple chronic issues sure makes me feel less of a woman. No, not a man. That won’t be easier. I’m rather a very weak woman that is constantly trying to exist. Barely surviving . At this point in my life, I always wonder what it would be like to be pain free.
I’m in a constant battle with my own body every other time. when I’m not enduring extreme abdominal and lower back pain that makes me feel like
I’m in labor, I am struggling with an extremely heavy menestrual flow. When I’m not battling migraines or clustered pain throughout my body not forgetting the forever bloating, I’m dealing with so much pelvic pressure and even though that comes with a prize that is the urge to frequently use the bathroom, other times i can’t get my body to pass whatever call that was. It’s frustrating .
When it’s not that frustration, its the other elephant in the room. I do battle with Hirsutism. Hirsutism is the unwanted male-pattern hair growth on places we wouldn’t expect to have hair. It can result from excess male hormones. While this doesn’t cause me any pain (other than having to choose a suitable hair removal method ),I wonder if you’d like to hear what it does to my mental state? (I will write about this soon.)
I think about my insulin resistance, anxiety and depression episodes, insomnia, fatigue and I’m just starting to get my mind around the possible infertility issues that come with all of my diagnoses and well, It sucks to be me.
Everyday, I woman up and deal with my symptoms. It’s never a no pain call. If it’s not this, it’s that. I always have a hard time explaining to people how bad i feel when all they see is the bold, beautiful, fake smile that I never forget to attach to my face every morning when i wake up. It’s the first thing I do before checking my phone.
However, today, My point is, I am in pain 24/7/365. Some days are better than others and I do not say it as often as I should, but I am honestly thankful to everyone that has held my hand through it all. With the Coronavirus Pandemic going on, I have to take note of everyone that ensured I did not break down. Those of you all that helped me back to my feet when I’ve been down for too long. I am especially grateful to you all that let me rest when I had to cancel plans . Thank you being so helpful to this girl.
A special shout out to all my family and friends that, despite the Covid-19 madness going around came out to support me and my family after my dad’s untimely death. Thank you for the phone calls, text messages and even the monetary support. SEGERO,CLASS OF 2010, Your act of kindness touched me so much and will definitely pass it on to others. I am blessed to have known you in this lifetime.
Now, someone please pass me the
Blunt Metformin and Inositol.